Talking about…

...One-Night-Stands (ONS)

an awkward subject, but I'd like to blog my thoughts about it anyhow. I'll try...

In my point of view there are several types of ONS:

the quick-one:
The first type that I want to describe is the one I wouldn't want to have.... the one that passes off very quickly, with a man you have never met before, sympathetic or not doesn't matter. Helpful are a good basis of alcoholic influence as well as long-term abstinence and the intent to end with it as fast as possible.
advantage: it's quite easy to find it - there are good chances on every party or other juvenile conventions to find someone with the same demands. This very spontaneous type of ONS could also probably lead to undivined surprises and never-before-known-situations (positive or negative...)
danger: the one you've found could be very nasty, dislikeable and ignorant so that you don't get anything out of it. Hopefully you are that drunk that you can't remember anything afterwards, otherwise this could get very frustrating - the reason why I'd rather discourage from this sort of ONS.

the planned-one:
Imagine to meet a very handsome and/or charismatic, interesting guy by coincident- the one every woman wants. You do not want to have a relationship with him (reasons can be complex), but he's the one you've ever dreamed of in your undisclosed dreams. And imagine furthermore that you have a little conversation with him, find out that you don't fit with each other but he's good enough for your intention, and make some plans with him over your unsatisfied needs. The next step could happen immediately or some time/days later, planned and both know what will happen between them.
advantage: he's likeable, it's deliberated, chance for a nice and fulfilled night/time is high. Hint: some (not too much) alcohol might heighten your jest of the situation enormously.
disadvantage: hard to find and could be tricky to ask...
danger: you could develop some feelings for the man - Important hint: NEVER allow feelings for a ONS-person! It only leads to disaccords, uncomfortable situations, stress and intricacies!
Apart from that it's the one I can highly recommend!

the recommended-one:
imagine a friend of yours plays your game too and offers to share her favourites with you.
advantage: easy to get, you don't have to talk around the essential point, you know in advance what you'll get, have something to talk about with the friend afterwards
disadvantage: hard to find such a friend
danger: might be complicated with the friend and see important hint at the planned-one.

the repeated-one:
starts where the so-far-described ones end...
advantage: you know exactly what you get and it was great seemingly (otherwise you don't repeat it...), the more you train the better it gets
danger: see important hint at the planned-one! - that's the main reason why I discourage everyone from the repeated-one. In most cases the repeated-one leads to chaos and discord by at least one of the participants. It's better to have fun for one night and keep it in mind as long as desired than to have troubles with unrequested feelings.

Of course there are several other or mixed forms of ONS and of course there’s a chance that ONS (especially the repeated-ones) can lead to relationships and sometimes even marriage… but that’s another story ;-)